The Spirituality of Little Things

Last night I went to see Stranger Than Fiction for the second time.  (Hint: if I’m willing to pay full price to see a movie, I like it.  If I’m willing to pay full price twice, I really, really like it.)  I think one of the reasons why I like this movie so much is because it synchs up with an idea I’ve been developing for a while about what matters in the spiritual life.

This is what I think: when it comes to spirituality and loving God, what matters most isn’t the big things that you do (although those are important), but the little things.  It’s the spiritual version of “Mind the pence and the pounds will mind themselves.”  It’s not having ecstacies, or spending hours every day in front of the Eucharist, or going to foreign countries to die as a martyr, it’s whether you say “Thank you” to the check-out lady at the grocery store.  It’s whether you clear your own dishes from the table.  It’s how you treat your family or your roommates on the day you’re coming down with a cold.  The little things add up, eventually far outweighing the big things.  I would far rather have a husband who comes home to eat dinner with me every night than one who takes me on a long cruise, and then doesn’t bother to see me the rest of the year.

In addition, I think it’s the training we go through by doing the little things that make the big things possible.  A man who finds a hundred little things every day to show his wife he loves her, from opening a door to scraping the frost off her windshield, isn’t going to be tempted much when another woman “makes him an offer he can’t refuse.”  Little by little we train ourselves in unselfishness and love.  When the chance comes to do the big thing, to jump in front of the bus to save the kid or take the bullet for your friend or whatever, you do it without thinking.  Because that’s the kind of man or woman you are.  That’s the person you’ve trained yourself to be.

This is also my definition of integrity.  It’s a whole-life consistency, a million tiny decisions, all pointing the same way.  The things we do without thinking show more about our true characters than the most deliberated-over decision.  I think this also has to do with what it means to be “pure of heart.” (Matthew 5:  When a person’s whole life points toward love, that is a person who will surely see God.

So in this season of holiday frenzy and compulsory good cheer, I think it’s good to remember that it’s the little things that count.  Smile and say thank you.  Appreciate the light on a child’s face, the way a snowflake dances through the air, the million tiny things our God does every day to show us He loves us.  And then do the same for the people you’re with, no matter who they are.  It’s all in the little things.

~ by Bernadette on December 18, 2006.